Maintaining a healthy relationship is challenging and requires the fruits of labor for love. In order for a healthy relationship to survive in the age of social media, hook up sites, and a growing need for instant gratification, it’s important for you to understand the difference between love and infatuation.
In our youth we’re too naive about sexuality and relationships that we look for love prematurely when we should be looking for friendship. It’s a state of confusion caused by our youthful ways. In our youth we look for love instead of friendship first. Lucky for us our youthful ways eventually transform into wisdom and understanding; an understanding that friendship comes first and the Yucky “L” Word comes long after.
It’s the obscuring or embellishing of the truth of a situation with misleading or irrelevant information about love that creates the confusion to distinguish between love and infatuation.
The smoke and mirrors of love is why 99% of the time relationships never get beyond the stage of infatuation – which is most often not reciprocal, which reminds me of the saying, “love someone more than they love you.” An odd concept but one I am beginning to believe is the key to a healthy and successful relationship.
Deep down inside I would like not to believe or feel like this might be true but it’s a sense of my maturity peaking through; a maturity open to different ideas of love and how they operate. Love and relationships are layered with bad emotions from bad relationships changing and molding the way we think about love. It’s not fair but it’s what is referred to as love and war. We fight with ourselves internally with the ideas of what we think love is, creating an internal battle; an internal battle that can easily be referred to as growing pains.
Life is a huge classroom; a class in the hard knocks of life and love. Love is something everyone should experience but you can only experience it if and when you understand the difference between love and infatuation.
Infatuation is like a balloon. We continue to blow and blow hot air into it because it’s fun but when it grows beyond a certain period it has nothing to do but burst and go flat. Once a balloon pops you can’t do anything with it but throw it away.
Love is stronger than infatuation and similar to those trick birthday candles. No matter how hard you blow the flame never goes out.
After watching Madea (played by Tyler Perry) who shares some words of wisdom in this video about relationships, it confirms the words written in my book of love and infatuation.
Love is tricky and not easy. If you have it, water it and help it grow. If you’re looking for it, be patient and stay true to who you are, the right person will come along. And for those of you in a relationship based on infatuation let it go, especially if they want to leave. One rule in a relationship to always remember, if they want to go, let them go.
