Let me share with you an interesting little anecdote about a friend of mine. A long time ago, Brad (I’ll call him) started chatting with some guy on Scruff. They both flirted casually and kind of sort of liked each other, even though they weren’t exactly making plans to meet. Brad was interested in someone else and the guy he was chatting with was dating someone else. Life happened, and five years later they were both in long-term relationships to different people. Fast forward five years after that: they were both single again. What do you know…the two of them got together!
Flirting That Will Never be Forgotten
All because of a few chats and a few virtual flirts, that at the time, seemed insignificant. This is why I believe that every flirt counts. You may not think much of flirting with someone online or in person. However, a lot of this mindless chit-chatting will stay in your memory for the rest of your life.
The brain is like a huge and expanding file cabinet. You experience a few things, you learn a few things, and then you toss them back into the file cabinet. You may not think of these things for years on end. However, they are always there in the back of your mind and are easily accessible whenever you decide you need them again.
So it is with flirting. The person you fall in love with may not prove to be the person you plan on marrying, or the person you start out liking. However, every flirt counts. Every nice conversation you enjoy can be stored away in your memories.
If your circumstances change (if a current relationship ends, or if your values change over time) and you happen to find yourself face to face—or Facebook to Facebook—with a former match, you both may want to explore a possible romance.
Network and Meet As Many People as Possible!
The point is this: if you are looking for love, don’t limit yourself to one or two prospects. Chat with as many people as possible, and if you feel a connection with a person, explore the relationship. Never feel tied down to one person, unless you both agree to an exclusive commitment.
Talk to twice as many people as you are comfortable with. Enjoy your conversation and practice your flirting skills. Because you never know how important one conversation might prove to be later on in life.
Think about it: If you want a job, where do you go? You go looking for a job online. You network amongst other people. So it should be with dating. Network…make some more friends! You have to be friends first with the person you date. You start with casual conversation, you flirt and talk, and then you move on into friendship. Then you move into dating and then maybe a serious relationship, if all goes well.
If you have no established friendship network, but instead talk to one or two “serious prospects” you are at serious risk of getting dumped and being left in the lurch emotionally.
My advice to single men today is to avoid isolating yourself. Talk to a few strangers a day and try to make a friend. Get involved in the community. Life’s just not that fun without a lot of friends. Besides…you never really know from what small beginnings your next serious relationship may come from.
