Last night, a Sunday, late at night, my phone rings. It’s a friend of mine who needs to tell me about his sexcapade. I was like, “Boy, I’m sleep.” He kept going anyway. You know when you tell somebody you’re sleep or doing something and they keep talking, and they’re the one who called you?
Anyway, I listened to his story. He was telling me how bad the sex was, and I was laughing because the story was hilarious. Then I asked him, “Well, how do you know if you’re good in bed or bad in bed?” He bust out laughing and said, “I’m good in bed.” I said, “How do you know that?”
I gotta be honest. When I had my podcast, Colorful Conversations with Connie and Corey, we had this topic. The podcast wasn’t as successful as I would have hoped. Here’s a snippet, or just watch it, and you’ll see our chemistry was unparalleled to any other chemistry out there. Unfortunately, we had artistic differences, and you know, sometimes the people we date don’t mess with us, so we had to dissolve. I wish me and her could have continued, because it was gonna be a popping show.
Enjoy the clip. I still think it’s one of the funniest of our shows. I wanted to add it to the article because I thought it was hilarious, and it’s truly the inspiration behind this article, so you can see what I said and how I said it. Take note of how long ago it was. September 2022. Sometimes our opinions and thoughts don’t change. But maybe they do. Oh, wow.
I can only speak for gay men, but all gay men think they’re cute and good in bed. I don’t care if they have a big one or a little one. You know what I’m talking about? Honestly, it’s because no one would ever tell you you’re bad in bed. Would you tell somebody they’re bad in bed? Especially somebody you’re never gonna see again?
Look at the world gay men live in. We have apps, Grindr, Scruff, Sniffies. We can pick up a guy in a minute who lives a block away, or even in your building. Now, that’s the one I’m scared of.
You know what they say. Don’t poop where you eat. Honey, I don’t. I try to stay a five-mile radius away when I’m trying to hook up with somebody. I don’t do that no more anyway, ha ha. It’s a dry spell, but that’s another topic.
So here’s the deal. Years ago I was chatting with somebody who said he was five miles away, more than that. Well, I have a doorman. I was waiting for his arrival, and all of a sudden I hear a knock on my door. No doorman ring. I opened the door and told him to come in, and he said, “Oh, I live in the building.” Oh my God. Let me just tell you, that was a mistake, because he was knocking on my door at 3 in the morning. But anyway, that means I’m good in bed, right?
Needless to say, I think people think they’re good in bed because nobody would ever tell them. If a guy in bed hears you moaning and groaning, he’s probably gonna leave thinking he was awesome.
Now, the thing about it is, if you’re interested in somebody and the sex is bad, what do you do? Do you tell them? How soon do you tell them? Day three? Well, that means you had sex on the first date, and that’s a problem in itself. But hey, who knows. As they always say, you gotta know early so you know what you’re working with.
My point is, you have to ask whether you’re good or bad, and I don’t know if you’re gonna have the courage to ask somebody, “Was I good?” They always say, don’t ask if you don’t want to know. Somebody might tell you you’re bad in bed.
Many gay men, unfortunately, learn what good sex is through porn, and every guy wants to be a porn star. Nowadays you can see porn anywhere, OnlyFans, X, formerly known as Twitter. Everybody’s a porn star. We’re taking the porn star career and turning it upside down, because everybody on the internet seems to be a porn star lately.
Whether you’re good in bed or bad in bed, I don’t know. Take the poll and let’s see who thinks they’re good in bed. Honestly, the poll is really relevant, because everybody’s gonna think they’re good in bed. Who’s gonna say they’re not? LOL
Cover illustration created with AI for OVAH MAG.
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